A number of Hollywood stars have commented on Mo’Nique’s confession that she and Sidney Hicks have an open marriage.
Gabourey Sidibe, Mo’Nique’s co-star in Treasured, reacted nonchalantly and mentioned, “It is probably not information to have an open marriage and open communication marriage.”
Regardless of the case, the blogosphere is abuzz with dialog about open marriages, which have been round for hundreds of years however have solely reentered the highlight because of some Hollywood {couples}.
Listed below are 5 myths about open marriages that it’s essential to cease believing:
1. Open marriages are all about intimacy
Greater than something, they’re about honesty and communication.
Many polyamorous {couples}, like blogger Jenny Block and her husband, struggled extra with secret affairs than with extramarital exercise itself.
In her article “Open Marriage Is Not A Fad,” Jenny mentioned, “Controlling one’s sexuality is now not the cornerstone of the connection. As an alternative, love and belief and intimacy are.”
As Mo’Nique instructed Barbara Walters, “Oftentimes, folks get into marriages and they do not know who they’re laying subsequent to. I am very snug and safe with my husband.”
2. Each companions have a number of lovers
Whereas each she and her husband are free to conduct extramarital affairs, Mo’Nique has shunned being intimate with different folks.
Jenny Block, then again, has a girlfriend, whereas her husband admits that he is too shy to choose up different women.
In both case, the roaming events are upfront with their companions about their actions exterior of the wedding.
3. Folks in open marriages take into account monogamy old style
Like most {couples}, non-monogamous {couples} are extra involved about what works for them than how they’ll trump different folks.
“I have been instructed that to these on the skin, folks within the open relationship neighborhood can come throughout as a smug group who assume they’re extra extremely advanced than the monogamous,” Jenny mentioned.
It isn’t that polyamorous {couples} are towards monogamy, it is simply that they’ve discovered it would not work for them.
4. Non-monogamous relationships are much less difficult than monogamous ones
Open marriage is not a straightforward manner out for individuals who cannot management their drive.
Open relationships are sometimes extra difficult just because they contain greater than two folks.
As one buddy in an open relationship instructed us, sustaining stability in her relationship means fixed communication.
And in contrast to straight, monogamous relationships, polyamorous {couples} typically really feel stress to suit into the heterosexual, normative, “mother, dad, two and a half kids, and a canine” mannequin for marriage.
5. Polyamory is dangerous to youngsters
Those that uphold monogamous marriages as the best might wonder if open marriages confuse kids or expose them to “debauchery” prematurely.
Block addresses the difficulty in lots of her articles, saying that whereas all exercise happens behind closed doorways, her younger daughter has been launched to her girlfriend.
Moreover, having an additional particular person round implies that Jenny and her husband have another particular person to assist out with child-rearing. It takes a village, in any case.
Denise Ngo is a contract internet author and editor specializing in love, courting, and relationships. She is the Managing Editor of Loverish and a author for PopSci.
