Most of us, at one time or one other, have had a jealous associate who was insecure concerning the individuals we work with. Perhaps they do not like that we’re engaged on a mission with a handsome man or gal, or assume we’re only a bit too pleasant with our lunchmate.
However one girl’s boyfriend is taking issues to a complete different stage, and he or she has no thought what to do about it.
The girl’s boyfriend is jealous of the lads she sees at work — who’re useless, as a result of she’s a mortician.
Jealous boyfriends are a dime a dozen, and the web is stuffed with tales about them. And this girl’s boyfriend might simply be a kind of run-of-the-mill insecure boyfriends. As she mentioned in her publish, “There are various circumstances the place he has acted jealous on the sight/considered me having a real interplay with one other man.”
And, to be truthful, her boyfriend’s points aren’t with out clarification. As she wrote in her publish, he has numerous trauma that has made it tough for him to kind trusting relationships, together with “being deserted by his dad and mom, groomed, and cheated on.”
“This has left him with extreme attachment points,” she mentioned, and, “he’s consistently jealous and nervous that I’m dishonest or mendacity to him.” However these days, issues have escalated in a weird method as she’s begun coaching for her dream profession as a mortician.
Her boyfriend is nervous that she will likely be extra interested in the useless males she works on as a mortician than she is to him.
Of all of the potential causes a girl’s boyfriend is jealous of the lads she sees at work, that is in all probability the final one any of us would count on. And his particular anxieties about it are on one other stage nonetheless.
“He made a remark about how me seeing one other man with a bigger d— would make him unhappy,” she wrote. Understandly, “this disgusted me for a lot of causes,” chief amongst them that he’s “sexualizing my job.”
“However he’s additionally displaying insecurity and jealousy once more over a useless physique.” And when she confronted him about how “bizarre” that’s, he doubled down and “even implied that I might be jealous if he noticed a useless bare girl who had a fatter a– than me.”
“Now this genuinely left me in shock,” she went on to say, which looks like an understatement. “I felt actually disgusted by him… and actually can’t course of why he would say one thing like that.” However, she’s in love and that is the one side of their relationship that’s problematic.
Individuals on Reddit felt like this girl was setting herself up for heartache, and that her boyfriend wanted to get assist for his belief and attachment points.
It is true, attachment points can wreak havoc on relationships. As therapist Jeff Guenther, generally known as TherapyJeff on YouTube and TikTok, says within the video beneath, an anxious attachment type like this girl’s boyfriend displays just isn’t their fault — it stems from the best way individuals are raised and the relationships they’ve with their dad and mom.
However Guenther says it is vital to work via these points in an effort to have safe relationships. He recommends remedy in an effort to study the right way to have wholesome shallowness and advocate on your personal emotional wants in wholesome methods.
Individuals on Reddit undoubtedly agreed, they usually urged this younger girl to not take that work on herself. As one Redditor put it, “another person’s insecurity is an issue that you may’t repair.”
And so they urged the younger girl to not give into her boyfriend’s weird insecurities about her job. “You conforming to habits like that solely results in them being controlling,” the particular person wrote. “The insecurity will at all times resurface and they also’ll attempt to prohibit you additional to really feel safer once more.
That looks like good recommendation, particularly when somebody’s insecurities go so deep that they are nervous about competing with the useless. It is in all probability greatest to depart it to the professionals.
John Sundholm is a information and leisure author who covers popular culture, social justice and human curiosity subjects.
