
Co-parenting after divorce is filled with myriad challenges and pitfalls, and for one mother on Reddit, that features her ex utilizing their child’s pictures for social media clout—and to woo new girlfriends on-line.
In a submit to Reddit’s “r/AmITheA–gap” subreddit, a discussion board the place individuals go to see in the event that they’ve mishandled a battle, the brand new mother described the irritating expertise she’s embroiled in together with her ex-husband—and the way she’s getting again at her son’s dad for utilizing pictures of his little one.
A mother found out how you can cease her ex-husband from utilizing their child to get dates.
The brand new mother says her ex texts her daily saying he “wants” new pictures of their son. However that is about all he has to do with their son apart from little one assist.
The mother says her ex-husband “is not current” of their son’s life however posts footage of him on Instagram daily.
She writes that she and her ex “divorced proper after my son got here into the world” as a result of she came upon he was dishonest on her. He does pay her little one assist, however she works to handle “many of the payments.” Regardless of this, her ex-husband likes to make a giant present of how he “banks me”—how he helps her financially—though it is not true.
He has subsequent to no involvement with their son past the financial, both. Except for blanketing his Instagram with the tyke, she writes that “he is not current in his life.” Nonetheless, her ex-husband texts her “daily saying that I must ship him a pic of our son for him to see if he’s okay.”
Each time she sends a photograph, her ex posts it on-line virtually instantly—which she finds very irritating, particularly since figuring out why he is been so adamant about retaining his Instagram up to date.
The mother found her ex has been utilizing their child to impress ladies on-line.
She not too long ago came upon about her ex’s new relationship and writes that she was “so upset” when she obtained the information as a result of it made it seem to be every little thing he’d been telling her was a lie—particularly in the case of the time he refuses to spend with their child. “He claims that his job takes all of his time,” and that’s the reason why “he does not have time for our son.”
She’s definitely not alone on this scenario if TikTok developments are any indication—the app is filled with memes about uninvolved dads utilizing pictures of their children to impress ladies, as seen beneath.
However for this mother on Reddit, it was definitely no laughing matter. She was offended and heartbroken, and talked about it to a buddy at size—and that buddy had an concept of how you can cease her ex-husband from utilizing their child to get dates and impress ladies with a pretend “good dad” Instagram persona.
The mother started including a watermark to each picture of her son in order that her ex-husband cannot use them on-line.
“I vented this to a buddy,” she writes. After an extended dialog, her buddy gave her an concept. “To any extent further, each time I ship my ex pics of our child, I am going to put a watermark with my identify [on] the image.”
She tried it immediately, and it undoubtedly labored—possibly a bit too effectively, as a result of she says that on the very first strive, her ex-husband had a complete meltdown. He started hurling profanity at her, calling her a “b-tch” and an “a-–gap” for altering the pictures.
Clearly, she struck a nerve—and he or she was clearly proper about his motives in continuously asking for child pictures. Nonetheless, given how outsized his response was, she wonders if she’s finished one thing flawed and requested her fellow Redditors for his or her two cents.
Folks on Reddit undoubtedly didn’t take kindly to the lady’s ex-husband utilizing pics of their child to impress ladies on-line.
Reddit customers had been firmly on the mother’s facet and agreed she did nothing flawed. If something, they thought she ought to take issues a step additional.
“He’s utilizing your footage to make it seem to be he’s a gift and concerned father, when he’s not,” one Redditor wrote, happening to counsel she “cease sending him pictures and simply reply with ‘Yup, James is ok at present.”
Many others agreed, like a person who commented, “If he does not wish to submit watermarked footage, he can take and submit his personal. He is utilizing your pictures to make himself appear to be an lively and concerned dad. You’re below no obligation to facilitate that charade.”
However some needed her to take issues additional nonetheless and go full-on petty to show her ex a lesson—by solely sending selfies of her and the infant cuddling collectively. Others urged including thought bubbles to the pictures with quotes about how a lot her child misses his dad or doing bizarre Photoshop edits that will make the pictures unusable.
After all, that could be taking issues a bit too far towards utilizing their son as a bargaining chip for revenge—a significant no-go in the case of co-parenting, as life coach Kate Anthony informed us in 2020.
“You could be mad post-breakup—you might even be actually justified in being mad,” she wrote, however placing your emotions on the middle places your children within the center.” That may be actually damaging for youngsters with divorced dad and mom, so Anthony advises that divorced dad and mom continuously ask themselves “‘is that this actually in my kids’s greatest curiosity?’ If the reply is ‘No,’ take a deep breath and transfer on.”
Okay, so turning pictures of your child into cartoons mocking your ex-husband may be a bridge too far. However you’ll be able to’t blame the individuals of Reddit for occupied with it.
John Sundholm is a information and leisure author who covers popular culture, social justice and human curiosity subjects.