
By Fairley Lloyd
Earlier this yr, I used to be unexpectedly laid off together with a proportion of the corporate. Though it’s been a number of months, I’m nonetheless struggling to search out work, which fills me with anxiousness.
Sadly, this isn’t an unusual phenomenon. Whereas layoffs at all times occur, they’re particularly frequent this yr.
In all places I look, there appears to be information about an organization shedding workers. A lot of my pals have been laid off unexpectedly as properly. It doesn’t matter how massive the corporate is both: tech giants like Meta, Amazon, and Google have been within the information for layoffs as properly.
However smaller and mid-size corporations have had their justifiable share of layoffs.
The week I used to be laid off, I stored bouncing by way of the 5 levels of grief.
Denial and shock would flip into anger, after which it might flip into disappointment. It was lots to course of. And I can solely say that now, after a number of months after the layoff, I’ve hit the acceptance stage.
I nonetheless really feel the anger, disappointment, and shock, but it surely’s not as potent now. As a substitute, my focus has been on rediscovering what I need to do career-wise and searching for these alternatives.
However though I could also be within the “acceptance” stage now, it doesn’t imply that gained’t change. Grief is bizarre like that.
I don’t imagine most of us undergo the 5 levels within the actual order; we frequently expertise feelings exterior the 5 levels. And even when I don’t really feel the opposite feelings like anger and disappointment (which I doubt I gained’t), it doesn’t imply they weren’t justified emotions.
Layoffs are traumatic: there’s no manner of getting round it. They negatively influence somebody’s psychological well being, to not point out monetary wellness. Being laid off is like experiencing another loss in life, which implies you’ll grieve.
You’re not making the identical revenue you had been earlier than. You’re not in your common work routine. And also you’re not spending time with coworkers you used to see every single day — all of it’s a lot, and it shakes up your world in lots of adverse methods.
I gained’t fake that being laid off isn’t an enormous deal or one thing you possibly can simply “recover from” as a result of that’s not true. I’m nonetheless adjusting, and it nonetheless sucks that it occurred to me and so many different folks.
However I additionally really feel solace in understanding I’m not alone. My layoff doesn’t replicate my working expertise or who I’m as an individual. It’s one thing that occurred to me, and it’s one thing I want hadn’t occurred. But it surely has nothing to do with something I did or didn’t do.
I additionally am letting myself really feel what I really feel. I’m not censoring myself on how I “ought to” really feel.
There are not any “mistaken” or “proper” feelings to really feel after you lose a job. Like all loss in life, everybody will really feel totally different emotions, they usually gained’t essentially really feel the identical feelings on the identical time.
However that’s okay. Feelings aren’t linear, and neither is grief.
I want I had extra concrete recommendation for others who’ve additionally been laid off. I want I may mechanically discover a job once more and assist others accomplish that as properly. However that’s not in my management.
What is in my management is how I react to what occurred, and what I do to maneuver ahead. For me, meaning processing my feelings with out judgment, making use of and searching for work, and reaching out to my assist system. For another person, it might look totally different.
Both manner, a layoff is a type of loss. And like all loss, there is no such thing as a “proper” or “mistaken” technique to cope.
Life is already onerous sufficient. We don’t have to make it more durable by telling ourselves how we must always really feel about conditions. Let your self really feel what you do, and do what it is advisable do to heal. That’s all we will do.
Fairley Lloyd is a contributing author to Unwritten, The Mighty, Revoloon, Girls AdvaNCe, and Thought Catalog, assistant editor for Spoonie Journal, and former editor-in-chief of The Issues Unsaid. She covers many matters, together with sexuality, psychological well being, race and ethnicity, and feminism.
This text was initially printed at Unwritten. Reprinted with permission from the creator.