By Kristen Buccigrossi
I save the whole lot. Photos, texts, Snapchats, mementos of loopy nights, ticket stubs — something that can assist me to recollect the previous (I’m not a hoarder if that’s what you might be considering!).
Somebody as soon as stated to me that it’s a bizarre behavior and requested why do I try this?
It wasn’t till lately that I noticed, it was clearly to remind myself of the great instances, but in addition, to remind myself of all the issues that I’ve overcome.
Once I’m having a second of weak point and take into consideration the previous getting in a unique path, I’ll search for outdated texts or footage to remind myself that I wasn’t fallacious, that is the best way that it needs to be.
However actually, I would like a relentless reminder that these individuals I selected to stay round and get harm by aren’t good for me.
It’s bizarre, I do know, however typically I would like reminders of the previous to know that I’m not loopy and that I didn’t do something fallacious for the tides to vary and folks to get washed out of my life.
I used to place all my belief in individuals. I had this false hope about everybody and believed that we have been all right here for a similar function, to be there for each other.
The older I get, the extra that I understand not everybody has this similar motive in thoughts: some are simply in it for themselves.
It’s nonetheless such an odd idea to me, so typically I’ve to return and remind myself that they weren’t in it for my mates or for my data, they’re out to raised solely themselves. Generally I would like a relentless reminder that these persons are solely looking for themselves.
Oddly sufficient, the identical one who advised me that it was bizarre to avoid wasting the whole lot, jogged my memory as soon as once more in the present day why I save the whole lot.
Once I was compelled to confront the lies that he had fed me for the previous 5 years, I appeared again on these texts to remind myself that I wasn’t the loopy one. He had put this false hope in me and would play it off like I used to be the one who was making stuff up in my very own thoughts.
He’s the kind of man who would lead me on and make me really feel like I used to be doing one thing fallacious each single time he didn’t comply with via. He is without doubt one of the causes that I finished trusting individuals and made me afraid to be in a relationship. He’s the rationale I began saving the whole lot as a result of I wanted a relentless reminder that he wasn’t the one for me.
Lesson to be realized: It’s okay to be reminded of one thing from the previous, however don’t let it have an effect on your future.
Every so often, it’s good to be reminded of one thing that had as soon as occurred, however it’s higher to maintain your head up and preserve transferring ahead. You went via these moments in life for a motive and now you’re a higher individual due to it.
You might have already come this far. Don’t let one thing maintain you again from one thing even higher taking place to you.
As your individual private reminder, they have been by no means the one. You deserve somebody who will deal with you ways you should be handled.
Kristen Buccigrossi is a author and Pittsburgh on-air radio character whose work has been printed on Huffington Submit, Pittsburgh Tribune-Evaluation, YourTango, and Unwritten.
This text was initially printed at Unwritten. Reprinted with permission from the writer.